There once was a polly called Abbott,
Whose ears stuck out like a rabbit,
To win an election,
Gives him an erection,
But he won't make it a habit.

There is this geezer called Rudd,
Some people think he's a dud,
He speaks Chinese,
With the greatest of ease,
And thinks everyone is his bud.

There once was a misogynist called Rudd
Although he thinks himself a stud
He often gropes women in strip-joints
And rarely if ever makes any good points

When as if he ever shuts up
He cowers in the corner like a sick pup
Oh Mr Rudd you pretend to love gays
But let us all rejoice and count down the days

When you will be booted from your post
Gillard will surely vote for LIBs
For you have told lies and fibs
NEVER EVER UNDER any circumstance
Will voters give you another chance

Mr Abbott, it is often said
Likes women, because he is wed.
But when he was at Uni
He went a bit loony
And threw a punch at some poor girls head

Maqqa wrote on Aug 22^nd, 2013 at 11:25pm:

There once was a misogynist called Rudd Although he thinks himself a stud He often gropes women in strip-joints And rarely if ever makes any good point When as if he ever shuts up He cowers in the corner like a sick pup Oh Mr Rudd you pretend to love gays But let us all rejoice and count down the days When you will be booted from your post Gillard will surely vote for LIBs For you have told lies and fibs NEVER EVER UNDER any circumstance Will voters give you another chance

You appear to be the suppository of all poetry knowledge.

Try again.  Let me help you:
A limerick is a short, humorous, often ribald or nonsense poem,[1] especially one in five-line anapestic meter with a strict rhyme scheme (AABBA)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerick_(poetry)

There once was a poster called Maqqa,
Whose brain blew up like a cracker,
He looked such a fool,
As he played with his tool,
Never mind, he's soon off to the knacker.

THe Shadow Environment Minister one wrote a thesis
About how an ETS is the best thing for emissions decreases
But the Leader of his Party
Is really not a smartie
So now Mr Hunt only talks a load of faeces


Ultimately it is by harnessing the natural economic forces which drive society that the pollution tax offers us an opportunity to exert greater control over our environment.
- Greg Hunt
http://www.petermartin.com.au/2011/03/why-we-need-carbon-tax-by-coalitions.html

There was a woman named Julia
Who really thought that she could fool ya
She wriggled and squirmed
But voters discerned
That her tax was just that - a tax.

Her numbers went down
The unions all frowned
But Julia said just wait
They will turn right back around

The fat tub of lard
She really went hard
Playing the sex card

But oh what an epic failure
From the biggest bitch in Australia
For the polls became worse
And so she was turfed
For Rudd the Dud
Oh what a failure.

Why is it that the concept of a limerick is a bit too complex for the Liberal voters to grasp?

Don't bother answering - I think we already know the answer.

Maqqa and Matty just started
to write limericks, but they departed
from the classic form,
as is usually the norm
because they are so smacking retarded

With robust conservative zeal
Tony highlighted his candidates sex appeal
This problem with chicks
Is not easy to fix
For this slimy, misogynist eel

Rudd to wabbitt

Does this guy ever shut up.


;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

The Libs' money man is Joe Hockey,
Whose figure is certainly stocky,
He writes all his sums,
On his colleagues' bare bums,
And the totals are decidedly rocky.

Then there is a Pyne, name of Chris,
Who even his mother won't kiss,
He's developed this smug,
Ugly look on his mug,
Who could resist taking the piss?

There is a Liberal Party,
That smiles on the rich and the arty,
They target the poor,
And make them pay more,
And most of their women are tarty.

There once was a person named howard
and nobody called him a coward
he took us to war
oh what a bore
because over him everyone towered

SOB

http://spotofborg.com/files/persecution5.jpg

A young millionairess named Eve
Gave birth to a baby named Steve
To ease post-natal blues
she had a lovely world cruise
Funded by Paid Parental Leave

The Libs have a Bishop named Julie,
Who is up herself really and truly,
She snarls and she sneers,
Thinks no-one's her peers,
And often becomes quite unruly.

roses are red
violets are blue
stop the boats
and the carbon tax too

Why is it the far right cant grasp the concept of limericks?

SOB

http://spotofborg.com/files/persecution5.jpg

Sir Spot of Borg wrote on Aug 23^rd, 2013 at 4:00pm:

Why is it the far right cant grasp the concept of limericks? SOB http://spotofborg.com/files/persecution5.jpg

They probably have more important things to do. Like working. You should try it. 

But seriously, are we really going to start connecting peoples political leanings to someone's ability to write a limerick?

rabbitoh07 wrote on Aug 22^nd, 2013 at 11:34pm:

Maqqa wrote on Aug 22nd, 2013 at 11:25pm: There once was a misogynist called Rudd Although he thinks himself a stud He often gropes women in strip-joints And rarely if ever makes any good point When as if he ever shuts up He cowers in the corner like a sick pup Oh Mr Rudd you pretend to love gays But let us all rejoice and count down the days When you will be booted from your post Gillard will surely vote for LIBs For you have told lies and fibs NEVER EVER UNDER any circumstance Will voters give you another chance You appear to be the suppository of all poetry knowledge. Try again.  Let me help you: A limerick is a short, humorous, often ribald or nonsense poem,[1] especially one in five-line anapestic meter with a strict rhyme scheme (AABBA) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerick_(poetry)

ooooooooooooooooooooo duh!!!!... who bloody cares.sour puss

cods wrote on Aug 23^rd, 2013 at 4:16pm:

rabbitoh07 wrote on Aug 22nd, 2013 at 11:34pm: Maqqa wrote on Aug 22nd, 2013 at 11:25pm: There once was a misogynist called Rudd Although he thinks himself a stud He often gropes women in strip-joints And rarely if ever makes any good point When as if he ever shuts up He cowers in the corner like a sick pup Oh Mr Rudd you pretend to love gays But let us all rejoice and count down the days When you will be booted from your post Gillard will surely vote for LIBs For you have told lies and fibs NEVER EVER UNDER any circumstance Will voters give you another chance You appear to be the suppository of all poetry knowledge. Try again.  Let me help you: A limerick is a short, humorous, often ribald or nonsense poem,[1] especially one in five-line anapestic meter with a strict rhyme scheme (AABBA) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerick_(poetry) ooooooooooooooooooooo duh!!!!... who bloody cares.sour puss

A silly old woman called Cods
Once found herself all at odds
When the point of a thread
She couldn't get in her head
We'll all be happy when off she sods

Then there was rabbitoh07,
Who thought he was going to heaven,
But he dissed an old lady,
Now his future is shady,
As soon as his motor stops revvin.

rabbitoh07 wrote on Aug 23^rd, 2013 at 12:05am:

Maqqa and Matty just started to write limericks, but they departed from the classic form, as is usually the norm because they are so smacking retarded

;D ;D ;D

Reminiscent of former yahooligan days.
There was a long-running thread where posters could get their point across using re-worked, well known poetry.

It was a good fun break from the sh!t-slinging that eventually closed that MB down.

As was the case back then, most of the right-whingers just don't get it.

:)

....

PZ547 wrote on Aug 23^rd, 2013 at 8:20pm:

....

good attempt.  ;)

PZ547 wrote on Aug 23^rd, 2013 at 8:20pm:

....

Only four dots. Doesn't a Limerick have five lines?

Peter Freedman wrote on Aug 23^rd, 2013 at 7:04pm:

Then there was rabbitoh07, Who thought he was going to heaven, But he dissed an old lady, Now his future is shady, As soon as his motor stops revvin.

Dissing old ladies is fine
So long as you do it in rhyme
I can be a big prick
with a terse limerick
Especially after 2 bottles of wine

Old ladies deserve some respect,
Which is what cods is going to get,
So leave her alone,
Or I'll be on the phone,
To have you desexed by a vet.

Quantum wrote on Aug 23^rd, 2013 at 4:03pm:

Sir Spot of Borg wrote on Aug 23rd, 2013 at 4:00pm: Why is it the far right cant grasp the concept of limericks? SOB http://spotofborg.com/files/persecution5.jpg They probably have more important things to do. Like working. You should try it.  But seriously, are we really going to start connecting peoples political leanings to someone's ability to write a limerick?

Yup. Its pretty obvious isnt it?

SOB

http://spotofborg.com/files/persecution5.jpg

Peter Freedman wrote on Aug 24^th, 2013 at 12:41am:

Old ladies deserve some respect, Which is what cods is going to get, So leave her alone, Or I'll be on the phone, To have you desexed by a vet.

well thats pretty good..........Ill drink to that.. ;D ;D

my first limerick...WOW.