Please join me in welcoming a most esteemed new board member, Psycho Analist. Doktor Analist specialises in the field of anal dilation, scatological analysis and stool mastication. Along with the old boy, the good doktor has read scatology at the prestigious University of Balogney.

I am sure you will give him a most hearty welcome in our usual jolly manner. I ask those with anal ailments to kindly seek a consulation at the Doktor’s clinic. The Doktor is a busy man. I’m told he keeps a most comfortable stool for patients, no?

Hear hear.

Excellent.  I look forward to hearing his insights in anal dilation.  fascinating stuff.

We all do, Honky, we all do. The Doktor is regarded as an eminent specialist in his field - as far afield as Dubbo if I’m not mistaken.

Hi Grappler alias. :P

Vell zank you very much for zis warm velcome but my first patient who is yet to attend his first session haz managed to get another zing wrong that I can add to his list of zings wrong he haz got.

I yam ze doktor of psycho analizing vich mean I analize your psyche but I do not dilate it. On zee contrary, dilated psyches zeems to be zee major problem around here. Zere must me zomething in zee water that corrupts the psyche to make zem large analizations and I yam here to help.

So Carnal, can I expect to analize you on my couch at 4pm on Tuesdays?

Why, thank you, Doktor. I would love to join you in this psychic adventure. I shall, of course, need to check my diary, but I will endevour to free up my schedule.

Oh. I just remembered. The old boy and I have shuttlecock on Tuesdays. Do you have any other times?

Karnal wrote on Mar 14^th, 2014 at 11:27pm:

Why, thank you, Doktor. I would love to join you in this psychic adventure. I shall, of course, need to check my diary, but I will endevour to free up my schedule. Oh. I just remembered. The old boy and I have shuttlecock on Tuesdays. Do you have any other times?

Excellent news Carnal, perhaps vee can analize your relationship viz this boy you speak of and vy you choose zis mode of transport for your genitals? Yes?

I don’t know if you could call it a relationship, it’s hardly consensual.

Still, he never complains. That’s the important thing, eh?

Well, he does, but who listens?

Do you have medication, Doktor? I’d like him chemically restrained.

Karnal wrote on Mar 15^th, 2014 at 12:00am:

I don’t know if you could call it a relationship, it’s hardly consensual. Still, he never complains. That’s the important thing, eh? Well, he does, but who listens? Do you have medication, Doktor? I’d like him chemically restrained.

I am sorry Carnal, but I haz had to bump you down my listz as I have now found the most disturbed individual on this sites. Mr Arsie is in more need of my help than anyvon else here so I need to make it a priority to treat him before he acts as on anothzer Daniel Morcombe type innocent. It iz my civic duty to ze citizens of Australia and especially Queerzland.

Voices . . .always these voices!

You should not hear them anymore.  Rumour is that the Psycho Analist has had his name removed from the appropriate register.

Aussie wrote on Mar 17^th, 2014 at 3:04pm:

You should not hear them anymore.  Rumour is that the Psycho Analist has had his name removed from the appropriate register.

Sexual abuse, was it?

I’m not surprised. There was always something peculiar about that one.

Where do you hear all these rumours, Aussie? They’re usually spot-on.

Karnal wrote on Mar 17^th, 2014 at 7:19pm:

Aussie wrote on Mar 17th, 2014 at 3:04pm: You should not hear them anymore.  Rumour is that the Psycho Analist has had his name removed from the appropriate register. Sexual abuse, was it? I’m not surprised. There was always something peculiar about that one. Where do you hear all these rumours, Aussie? They’re usually spot-on.

In a parallel World, not far from a place near you.  Phil might know about it.

8-)