Australian Politics Forum - unamused by the kitten

Bertram

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unamused by the kitten
Jun 19^th, 2012 at 10:49pm

One of my old students just sent me some funny animal pictures. A single mouse click was all it took and this crap came beaming to me at the speed of light. Ain't no mountain high enough, ain't no valley low enough, to keep a photo of a laughing dog from my inbox.

One is struck by the gulf between the technology in place to make the message possible, and the value of the message itself. I chose to interpret it as an ironic take on the communications revolution. Look, she is saying, here we are in the new millenium, able to send data across the oceans faster than a speeding whippet, yet we have nothing to say, so we send each other amusing pictures of kittens. Look at the kitten, Bertram! It's in someone's pocket! Ha ha!

Or perhaps she felt that I am a simpleton who would welcome such kittens in his inbox, and that when I saw its dear little ears I would be happy. Though, in fact, I was unamused by the kitten.

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Frances Gold Member Offline Australian Politics Posts: 3577 In a Castle in the Hills Gender:	Re: unamused by the kitten Reply #1 - Jun 19^th, 2012 at 10:52pm
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Chard Gold Member Offline Mein Führer! I can walk! Posts: 1077 Alabama, USA Gender:	Re: unamused by the kitten Reply #2 - Jun 19^th, 2012 at 10:53pm
Back to top	Deterrence is the art of producing in the mind of the enemy... the FEAR to attack. IP Logged

Dsmithy70 Gold Member Offline ire futuis vobismetipsis Posts: 13147 Newy Gender:	Re: unamused by the kitten Reply #3 - Jun 19^th, 2012 at 11:54pm
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MOTR

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Re: unamused by the kitten
Reply #4 - Jun 20^th, 2012 at 3:59am

Bertram wrote on Jun 19^th, 2012 at 10:49pm:

One of my old students just sent me some funny animal pictures. A single mouse click was all it took and this crap came beaming to me at the speed of light. Ain't no mountain high enough, ain't no valley low enough, to keep a photo of a laughing dog from my inbox.

One is struck by the gulf between the technology in place to make the message possible, and the value of the message itself. I chose to interpret it as an ironic take on the communications revolution. Look, she is saying, here we are in the new millenium, able to send data across the oceans faster than a speeding whippet, yet we have nothing to say, so we send each other amusing pictures of kittens. Look at the kitten, Bertram! It's in someone's pocket! Ha ha!

Or perhaps she felt that I am a simpleton who would welcome such kittens in his inbox, and that when I saw its dear little ears I would be happy. Though, in fact, I was unamused by the kitten.

Love it! Keep the kittens flowing, I say.

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Hunt says Coalition accepts IPCC findings

"What does this mean? It means that we need to do practical things that actually reduce emissions."

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Sir Spot of Borg Gold Member Offline WE ARE BORG Posts: 26509 Australia	Re: unamused by the kitten Reply #5 - Jun 20^th, 2012 at 5:54am SOB
Back to top	Whaaaaaah! I'm a Moron! - edited by some unethical admin - you think its funny? - its a slippery slope IP Logged

Soren

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Re: unamused by the kitten
Reply #6 - Jun 21^st, 2012 at 10:29pm

Saw a girl on the bus today, bit of a fox, so I sat down opposite and attracted her attention by bursting a balloon. “I am a tomato,” I announced, when she looked up. “So am I a fruit... or a vegetable?” She didn't know, so I explained to her in a nerd voice that technically I am a fruit in that I grow above ground, but that the Australian Department of Trade considers me a vegetable for the purposes of import levy.

Sadly, she did not speak English, otherwise we would have been getting naked within the hour.

P.S.
You are trapped on a desert island with the Spice Girls. Food and rum have run out. You are weak from hunger and there is no hope of rescue. Which Spice Girl would you eat first?

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Soren Gold Member Offline Posts: 25654 Gender:	Re: unamused by the kitten Reply #7 - Jun 22^nd, 2012 at 9:56pm Sir Spot of Borg wrote on Jun 20^th, 2012 at 5:54am: http://trollcats.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/i_am_a_cat_with_a_human_body_you... SOB That's so you.
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Chard

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Re: unamused by the kitten
Reply #8 - Jun 22^nd, 2012 at 10:07pm

As I always say, Khârn the Betrayer was pretty fun to be around, and contrary to popular belief he actually had a sense of humor as well. Probably the best example was in the middle of the campaign during a sweeping of an Imperial Guard command post, with Khorne Berserkers and our Red Rivers company marching directly into the defensive fire. The closer we got, the more apparent it became that the only thing holding the Guardsmen together was a grizzled looking Commissar in full uniform, one gun turned on us and another firing on any of his men who looked like running.

Khârn was at the tip of the assault, and so he got to the Commissar first, plucking the screaming officer up by the neck and holding him over his head.

Then, out of nowhere one of the other berserkers grabs the Commissar's legs and roars "MAKE A WISH!". Well, as you can imagine everyone on both sides forgets about the fight, and watches Khârn and this other Khorne-worshiping marine just start pulling on this Commissar at both ends, the old man screaming out oaths and curses like you wouldn't believe! You could almost hear the sound of flesh tearing and bone snapping over the cheering.

Then, Khârn just let go. Totally not expecting it and pulling with all his might, the Khorne Berserker just falls backwards and starts tumbling with the near dead Commissar into a damaged hellhound, his armor grating off it and sparking!

Well, after the explosion we all turned back to Khârn, who had managed to keep a hold of the Commissar's fancy hat. Ol' Khârn put it on, and damned if it wasn't the funniest thing any of us had ever seen... till he turned to us and bellowed "I'M THE NEW COMMISSAR" at us.

They tell me five thousand traitor guardsmen died that day before someone could take that hat off him.

What a kidder!

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Deterrence is the art of producing in the mind of the enemy... the FEAR to attack.

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Chard Gold Member Offline Mein Führer! I can walk! Posts: 1077 Alabama, USA Gender:	Re: unamused by the kitten Reply #9 - Jun 26^th, 2012 at 9:12am
Back to top	Deterrence is the art of producing in the mind of the enemy... the FEAR to attack. IP Logged

Annie Anthrax Gold Member Offline Take the plan, spin it sideways Posts: 7057 Gender:	Re: unamused by the kitten Reply #10 - Jun 26^th, 2012 at 10:19am Soren wrote on Jun 21^st, 2012 at 10:29pm: P.S. You are trapped on a desert island with the Spice Girls. Food and rum have run out. You are weak from hunger and there is no hope of rescue. Which Spice Girl would you eat first? Ginger (anti-nausea)
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Chard

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Re: unamused by the kitten
Reply #11 - Jun 27^th, 2012 at 8:49am

The second time I crossed paths with Khârn was in a later stage in the campaign. We were besieging one of the major hives of the planet, and I tell you what that place was locked up tighter than a Dark Eldar's pants. My commander, Oxlor the Vilest, was stuck in an argument with some idiot leader of some group of Death Guard. You could see the smell it was so bad. I could tell Oxlor wasn't happy, since everyone knows the Death Guard's answer to everything is to just walk at it and watch your bits fly off. Not so good for us soft and squishy guys.

Out of nowhere, this big hand grabs our commander by the shoulder and just hefts him aside, three whole trenches back where he rebounds off a basilisk. The crew was so shocked they fired off a round on a horrible trajectory, and the shell streaked high into the sky.

Khârn the Betrayer just dusts himself down, and then picks back up what he had been holding. Now, I'm no techpriest and I never will be, but I know a nuclear warhead when I see it. I don't know where he got it.

No one says anything, so The Betrayer just punches the Plague marine in the face, and stuffs the warhead into the leaking mess of his stomach while he was still reeling.

No run up, no preparation. He just throws the other marine into the air at the hive. For a moment it actually looks like he's thrown the warp-damned fool OVER the hive, but as he flies over the top the basilisk shell comes down and spears him through the whole hive! There's a low boom noise, the ground shakes, and then the whole hive IMPLODES!

Everything clears, and Khârn looks at me, and I feel about one foot tall. I don't know if he recognized me, but he leans down and whispers. Khârn WHISPERS to me.

"I was trying to hit the Emperor's Children on the other side" he confides in me, and then nudges me as though it's supposed to be our little secret.

I was in traction for a MONTH.

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Deterrence is the art of producing in the mind of the enemy... the FEAR to attack.

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Phallic Baldwin Senior Member Offline Phallic Baldwin Posts: 370 Gender:	Re: unamused by the kitten Reply #12 - Jun 27^th, 2012 at 10:35pm
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Soren

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Re: unamused by the kitten
Reply #13 - Jun 27^th, 2012 at 11:05pm

I don’t normally advertise on this forum. However, I am trying to sell my step-ladder- let me know if you are interested. It is a deluxe one because I, personally, would never settle for anything less.

I am not sentimental about throwing it out, since it is only my step-ladder. I never knew my real ladder; he abandoned us when we were small and I was raised in the forest by a family of foxes. One day I'll tell you of how we were found by a farmer, of our slow return to civilisation, and the adventures we had along the way. It is a beautiful story; stranger than any fiction.

But do you want this ladder or not?

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MissFixItOrElse Full Member Offline Australian Politics Posts: 133 Gender:	Re: unamused by the kitten Reply #14 - Jun 27^th, 2012 at 11:21pm I don’t normally advertise this, but I hate cats. I hate mice too. Puppy dogs on the other hand are cute as.
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