Australian Politics Forum - Election Limericks

Peter Freedman Gold Member Offline Australian Politics Posts: 5275 Wellington Gender:	Election Limericks Aug 22^nd, 2013 at 11:02pm There once was a polly called Abbott, Whose ears stuck out like a rabbit, To win an election, Gives him an erection, But he won't make it a habit. There is this geezer called Rudd, Some people think he's a dud, He speaks Chinese, With the greatest of ease, And thinks everyone is his bud.
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Maqqa

Gold Member

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14% - that low?!

Posts: 16000

Re: Election Limericks
Reply #1 - Aug 22^nd, 2013 at 11:25pm

There once was a misogynist called Rudd
Although he thinks himself a stud
He often gropes women in strip-joints
And rarely if ever makes any good points

When as if he ever shuts up
He cowers in the corner like a sick pup
Oh Mr Rudd you pretend to love gays
But let us all rejoice and count down the days

When you will be booted from your post
Gillard will surely vote for LIBs
For you have told lies and fibs
NEVER EVER UNDER any circumstance
Will voters give you another chance

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« Last Edit: Aug 22^nd, 2013 at 11:32pm by Maqqa »

Bill 14% is not the alcohol content of that wine. It's your poll number

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rabbitoh07 Gold Member Offline Australian Politics Posts: 2783 Gender:	Re: Election Limericks Reply #2 - Aug 22^nd, 2013 at 11:30pm Mr Abbott, it is often said Likes women, because he is wed. But when he was at Uni He went a bit loony And threw a punch at some poor girls head
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rabbitoh07

Gold Member

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Australian Politics

Posts: 2783
Gender: male

Re: Election Limericks
Reply #3 - Aug 22^nd, 2013 at 11:34pm

Maqqa wrote on Aug 22^nd, 2013 at 11:25pm:

There once was a misogynist called Rudd
Although he thinks himself a stud
He often gropes women in strip-joints
And rarely if ever makes any good point

When as if he ever shuts up
He cowers in the corner like a sick pup
Oh Mr Rudd you pretend to love gays
But let us all rejoice and count down the days

When you will be booted from your post
Gillard will surely vote for LIBs
For you have told lies and fibs
NEVER EVER UNDER any circumstance
Will voters give you another chance

You appear to be the suppository of all poetry knowledge.

Try again. Let me help you:
A limerick is a short, humorous, often ribald or nonsense poem,[1] especially one in five-line anapestic meter with a strict rhyme scheme (AABBA)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerick_(poetry)

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Peter Freedman Gold Member Offline Australian Politics Posts: 5275 Wellington Gender:	Re: Election Limericks Reply #4 - Aug 22^nd, 2013 at 11:46pm There once was a poster called Maqqa, Whose brain blew up like a cracker, He looked such a fool, As he played with his tool, Never mind, he's soon off to the knacker.
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rabbitoh07

Gold Member

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Australian Politics

Posts: 2783
Gender: male

Re: Election Limericks
Reply #5 - Aug 22^nd, 2013 at 11:47pm

THe Shadow Environment Minister one wrote a thesis
About how an ETS is the best thing for emissions decreases
But the Leader of his Party
Is really not a smartie
So now Mr Hunt only talks a load of faeces

Ultimately it is by harnessing the natural economic forces which drive society that the pollution tax offers us an opportunity to exert greater control over our environment.
- Greg Hunt
http://www.petermartin.com.au/2011/03/why-we-need-carbon-tax-by-coalitions.html

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matty

Gold Member

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Australian Politics

Posts: 11055
East Sydney
Gender: male

Re: Election Limericks
Reply #6 - Aug 22^nd, 2013 at 11:59pm

There was a woman named Julia
Who really thought that she could fool ya
She wriggled and squirmed
But voters discerned
That her tax was just that - a tax.

Her numbers went down
The unions all frowned
But Julia said just wait
They will turn right back around

The fat tub of lard
She really went hard
Playing the sex card

But oh what an epic failure
From the biggest bitch in Australia
For the polls became worse
And so she was turfed
For Rudd the Dud
Oh what a failure.

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« Last Edit: Aug 23^rd, 2013 at 12:16am by matty »

BILL SHORTEN WILL NEVER BE PM!!!!

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rabbitoh07 Gold Member Offline Australian Politics Posts: 2783 Gender:	Re: Election Limericks Reply #7 - Aug 23^rd, 2013 at 12:01am Why is it that the concept of a limerick is a bit too complex for the Liberal voters to grasp? Don't bother answering - I think we already know the answer.
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rabbitoh07 Gold Member Offline Australian Politics Posts: 2783 Gender:	Re: Election Limericks Reply #8 - Aug 23^rd, 2013 at 12:05am Maqqa and Matty just started to write limericks, but they departed from the classic form, as is usually the norm because they are so smacking retarded
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rabbitoh07 Gold Member Offline Australian Politics Posts: 2783 Gender:	Re: Election Limericks Reply #9 - Aug 23^rd, 2013 at 12:14am With robust conservative zeal Tony highlighted his candidates sex appeal This problem with chicks Is not easy to fix For this slimy, misogynist eel
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progressiveslol Gold Member Offline Australian Politics Posts: 17029	Re: Election Limericks Reply #10 - Aug 23^rd, 2013 at 12:47am Rudd to wabbitt Does this guy ever shut up.
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Peter Freedman Gold Member Offline Australian Politics Posts: 5275 Wellington Gender:	Re: Election Limericks Reply #11 - Aug 23^rd, 2013 at 4:00am The Libs' money man is Joe Hockey, Whose figure is certainly stocky, He writes all his sums, On his colleagues' bare bums, And the totals are decidedly rocky.
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Peter Freedman Gold Member Offline Australian Politics Posts: 5275 Wellington Gender:	Re: Election Limericks Reply #12 - Aug 23^rd, 2013 at 4:10am Then there is a Pyne, name of Chris, Who even his mother won't kiss, He's developed this smug, Ugly look on his mug, Who could resist taking the piss?
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Peter Freedman Gold Member Offline Australian Politics Posts: 5275 Wellington Gender:	Re: Election Limericks Reply #13 - Aug 23^rd, 2013 at 4:17am There is a Liberal Party, That smiles on the rich and the arty, They target the poor, And make them pay more, And most of their women are tarty.
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Sir Spot of Borg Gold Member Offline WE ARE BORG Posts: 26509 Australia	Re: Election Limericks Reply #14 - Aug 23^rd, 2013 at 5:48am There once was a person named howard and nobody called him a coward he took us to war oh what a bore because over him everyone towered SOB
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