A search and rescue mission has been launched for the Federal Liberal Party, which hasn’t been seen since September ...

Has anyone seen the Federal Liberal Party?

A search and rescue mission has been launched for the Federal Liberal Party, which has been unsighted since September federal election. Before then, the Liberal Party was everywhere – in shopping centres, TV campaigns, on the radio and in polling booths, extolling the virtues of a liberal agenda. But the last reported sighting was on the evening of September 7, the date of the poll victory, when several members were seen moving to the back of the auditorium as the celebrations came to an end, wearing fixed smiles and furrowed brows. They have not been seen since.

The Liberal Party was expected to take up office in Canberra, but instead a collective of hard-line Conservative ideologues, many brandishing membership cards of the Institute of Public Affairs, and funding from the rich 5%, arrived. In the eyes of some disaffected members, seemingly hell bent on establishing an underclass of long term unemployed manufacturing workers and public servants to mimic the competitive vertues of America.

Unions are being attacked, industries that have high union membership left to die, environmental programs have been ripped apart, scientific research has been denied funding, climate change policies are being pulled apart, green energy investment is being stopped, education curricula is being re-written, media instructed to shout “Aussie, Aussie, Aussie”, and refugees are being towed back from within Australian waters and sent back to Indonesia in bright yellow non-submersibles.

Members, families and friends are expressing deep concern and are calling for help from any member of the public who may have sighted the Federal Liberal Party in recent months. There have been several unconfirmed sightings of individual members, including one at a fruit cannery in Victoria and another on the ABC-TV program Lateline last week, but close examination found this person’s mojo had been replaced by a voice box controlled from the PM’s office.  If a Liberal Party member is found, it is advised to approach with caution, gently remove the News Ltd newspaper in its grasp, turn off Macquarie Radio, and on no account offer them Tea (Party).

Sprintcyclist wrote on Feb 14^th, 2014 at 1:36pm:


they're politicians and politicians don't work

LOL

We need a “retarded cut and paste” forum.

Sprintcyclist wrote on Feb 14^th, 2014 at 1:36pm:

Ah, my daily dose of Sprint comedy!

The simian took like 4 months holiday, there are only like 50 sitting days. Work? I do more work and I am flipping retired!

FriYAY wrote on Feb 14^th, 2014 at 2:25pm:

my apologies for thinking you'd come up with something intellectual

FriYAY wrote on Feb 14^th, 2014 at 3:00pm:

well in actual fact it does.

But never mind, go back to your biscuits and picking your nose

Karnal wrote on Feb 14^th, 2014 at 5:33pm:



We would be better off seeing him finishing a TAFE course on basic Economics 

adelcrow wrote on Feb 14^th, 2014 at 5:37pm:


I’d like to see him do something where he can use his hands - macrame, pasta scultpures, wall hangings will nails and pieces of string. You know, somewhere he can use his skills.