Agnes wrote on Aug 25^th, 2015 at 8:29pm:



agnes that tea cosy is a winner..no doubt about you we will definitely win the prize for making the most money at a fund raiser..the ching ching of the cash register will blind poor hanky panky into a rage.. and serve her right..when she has to hand over that trophy  she will be wetting herself  she has  won it so often she uses it to as her own personal foot bath....disgusting old tart...I know she is the Pres an she needs more respect... but when she insists on  a standing ovation after she has sung  the CWA anthem.
I am over it...

as for your corn problems agnes I have sent you a cope of my book... a signed one of course...just for you it will be worth a lot in a few more years if you hang around that long...signed copies are always the best ones to have.. and I only signed a couple of thousand... the wrist played up in the end so had to give up on the book tours..my publisher is devastated..but my new book... the Meaning of LIFEand LOVE..is in the works...I will of course take my time as it needs DEEP THOUGHT..and if pansi doesnt get back soon.. who knows what will happen to my recall senses.....yes the book is all from lifes experiences...I have a  dance card full of my  life experiences...and I am going to share them with the world.. I have already asked.. Cate Blanchett to play myself when they make the movie......she hasnt said yes yet....but it will happen....

I am not telling the girls as they will sulk if they cant be in the movie and I dread Glad when shes sulking...so please keep that to yourself agnes like the dear sweet girl I know you are....

Glad on one of her... its all about MEEE tantrums I find a real pizzzypoo...  she does the botox you know..

I caught her trying to stick the needle in her buttock...that bottom is a fake would you believe..and she thinks shes better preserved than the rest of us...
I could tell you so much agnes.. but I am too much a lady...and thats another thing Glad cant stand those who are up a  class. I have always said she has no couth... no couth whatever..

and whos riff raff might I ask... sounds like her pet poodle.. probably her corn therapist I am sure she would have put him up to that...no dignity  at all..

agnes dear I havent written the book yet.. about Lifes Experiences...so Cate was just in my passing thoughts...we have a lot in common we both have a thing about  obsolete  Power Stations...

of course another choice is Julie Roberts..we shall see how the book turns out..

I have sent you my book of Hints dear it has the corn cure recipe in it...page 241 I think it is..you will love it ..
the book I mean.


my new book wont be out until next year I get so many interruptions people wanting my autograph I cant walk down the streets now even the traffic comes to a stop...I know just how One Dimension feel...and as for the fan mail.. I have had to hire someone to take care of it..

mostly men I might add they must like my answers to all your Sexual Problems chapter...I listed them all. they went on for about 30 pages...my answers are brief though.,..

the favorite was about wetting the bed.. some lads do have a bad time dropsy you know.. I just said very matter of fact tie a knot in it...well thats what i would do if I had one..

I will get pansi to send you a copy of the good old CWA anthem...she knows it by heart dear girl.. always very proud when the band strikes up...she did want a girls marching band at one stage I am not sure what happened to that idea.....maybe the thought of dressing the girls up in shorts and high boots was a bit too much never mind twirling the walking sticks I doubt they would have ever got that bit right...we did buy all the uniform hats so the girls put them on just when the anthem is played of course..its all about respect..

good news about the cosies... Edith is knitting some scarves she does forget to cast off and one was 20 feet long.. but she wont undo it.. so we may have to use it as a banner...shes a dear soul though and once off theres no stopping her...unlike Clare who needs winding up every ten minutes...

I am sure pansi will know this riff raff...her and glad are very pally...if Glad goes out with riff she will tell pansi everything.. and I mean everything...so I do hope riffy behaves himself.. otherwise it will be the highlight of Show and Tell night...

and we know some of our members cant take too much excitement..
Rose fainted when Reg flashed his pecs once when he was showing us his latest tattoo....he said he will give us more warning next time....so we can open a few windows to cool us all down...just incase its a warm night.you understand.

AiA wrote on Aug 27^th, 2015 at 7:32am:



oh dear this is the CWA and we use it with discretion at all times

..if I talk about all my past hotties it will fill the pages and bore everyone to death and we try hard =not to go down that road at the CWA  we can ill afford to lose any more members...

as you would be  aware I try very hard not to talk about myself all the time...I believe in letting others have the floor just to keep their spirits up you understand...

pansi has so many ex lovers its hard to keep up.. the latest is bear grills I am sure you know of him.. a beast of a man..but she finds him irresistible  I think its the loin cloth to be honest but I am sure once he loses that she will see him for what he really is..I mean every girl knows a man in a loin cloth and a man in a suit there is no comparison is there,???...

anyway I may find a chapter in my new book of my Lifes Experiences regarding my greatest loves......when it is ready I will send you a copy..no pictures mind so you will in cognettoed so to speak...so you wont get hounded as you walk the streets like I do...

I am on the international book sellers clubs you know..

we are planning a rose ceremony at the club AiA its for those with the best tattoos...

Molly usually wins she is our tattoo star but we do encourage  the lads to show us what they have as well.. so do pop in any time as we need all the lads we can find...

of course you will have to control yourself when you see me.....and sip your tea nicely...we have enough dribblers already.

yes I understand agnes like all men its all lust..we have quite a fol;lowing at the good old CWA agnes I am sure you have noticed,,,all males I am sure of it..they like women who are discrete and charming and ladylike.. just like us... its called magnetism..and many  younger ones wished they had it...sadly we cant bottle it otherwise we would be in happyland...

its important for our good name that we keep some things a mystery dont you think???.. I am sure you do..

do you have some fresh tattoos to show us all? I think pansi might get a new one she wasnt happy with the last lot she had done abroad  the colours all ran turned rather nasty actually but this time round she wont use the back alleys I am sure... I do hope its not a nude of bear....she does enjoy the odd shock you know...

Agnes wrote on Aug 27^th, 2015 at 5:06pm:



so you wont be competing in the tattoo comp this year agnes  that is a shame  but  that does give Glad an in as she tends to get very upset when she loses.. each year she goes to great lengths to show and tell a story with her tattoos... but we never get it...

and when molly wins with her temples and shrines  Glad gets real stroppy...

last year we went through 3 bottles of bolly just to get mollys trophy off her...when she passed out we grabbed the pot and molly ran for her dear life....quite a todo I can tell you.. lucky for us an ambulance was passing and we popped Glad in as she looked the worse for wear as you can imagine....we had to tear half her clothes off..she had pushed the cup.. or orb as molly likes to call it...down her knickers..it was not one of her best moments I can tell you....the ambos were reluctant to take her but as luck would have it we had half a bottle of bolly left and they took that with our love and undying gratitude...and a plate of scones..

they did ask to be notified about this years event so they could change their shift.. I have no idea what thats about..

Glad has been very well behaved since...I might add I do not wish to give anyone a bad name...she does complain a lot but then she does have a lot to complain about.. doesnt she?..

you are such a flirt when Glad claps her eyes on you.. you will be gone for weeks..

so dont make any plans..

she love Barry Manilow so I hope you know all his songs...she will swoon...please  keep up the bodybuilding you will need it when you come to our CWA meets..they can be rather aggressive  sort of passive feely if you get my drift...

the girls like to know what they are getting early on.. not like the old days...wait until its all too late[ after the nuptials] to find out he has floppy disc problems..

I am just warning you just in case you go home with a few bruises and have to explain to a higher order..

you are just like all men..

I have a chapter on them in my new book...

double dirty twisting cheating R-isSoles..

is the tentative title for the chapter....

its about my experience with scoundrels..so many have I met on ozpols dating site ..

I have had to put up a new website calling for all those who had had dubious males pass through their lives..CADs in other words..some have even been left at the alter.. outrageous.

it is hard reading about some of the sob stories but they are all there all waiting to be exposed..and I WILL BE THE ONE TO EXPOSE THEM..

so watch it aia..if I catch you making eyes at agnes at the dip and glide..you will be exposed...

our next meet we will have a famous marshal arts person... teaching us self defence..... I know its been a long time happening...but Mr Kungfu has now retired and had plenty of time to deal with us girls...

he is very excited to teach us all the moves.. so please girls wear the new onesies madam cods has made you all...and you will all be wearing your brand new CWA headbands.....with the scone motive  please make sure that is facing the front.. just for the photo shoot......if Janis would stop smoking for the day that would be a nice choice....and Glad its bare feet so if yours are not ready for exposure maybe you can make the morning tea..... just a thought.

I can feel the excitement rippling through everyone of you...

this could mean a whole chapter in the annual CWA    Year Book...its what we have all been working for...

keep in mind there will be no mead served at the Selfdefence morning...and there will be no discussion.. so no emails please...

I need some advice about my contributions for the stall- I just cannot decide cods ( others)

1- macaroons

2-

or

3- lammies?



The Macaroons will keep best then the lamingtons and the cream puffs not so much unless we have refigeration close by of course..