Hmm well I don't see the posts Setanta, but I will proceed.

What do you think about being in partnership with a loved one?

Do you think a partnership requires sexual fidelity?  Are you expecting your partner to be faithful to you and you alone.?

How important is it that your partner is true and doesn't have a bit on the side. Is  honesty important to you.?

People on another post say they are true to their partner, even when members  of the opposite sex offer a good time.

So I thought to give a chance for people to discuss it here.

IS FIDELITY IMPORTANT TO YOU?

Sorry the other posts aren't showing up. I can't move them myself, so bit of a slow start here.

Hey Setanta,  can you post them here please.

I'll offer my opinion anyway.

Having been married for 17 years, and now long divorced, I experienced the lowest feeling in my life, was stunned in fact, to realise my husband had been getting into relationships with other women. Usually women with children. He would get involved with them, then disappear. I had a phone call or two from a woman in Canberra, who wanted to know where he was, because her son adored him and was very upset.

I was bewildered. Why would she call our home asking for him? He had gone down there to catch up with family and friends, he told me. He wasn't working  BAD BACK, and I worked fulltime.
EVEN THEN, I didn't believe the implications of those calls.  When I asked him about it, he said she was a crazy who was friends with his friends.

I never thought he would do that.   

I have some advice for people who believe their partner has been true to them.

I find that we essentially think that our partners are of the same mind as us.  Never having been unfaithful myself, and never having thought about 'straying' I just thought it natural that my partner was in the same frame.

I married the guy after all, and I guess I was really naïve to believe it worked both ways. Mutual in other words.

Silly me.  My advice?  If your partner is jealous and possessive, and may seem to question your own faithfulness, beware.
People tend to think their view of the marriage or partnership...( lets just call it partnership OK) is shared by their partner.  So a cheater , knowing their own lack of fidelity, thinks that applies to their partner as well. 
After all, they are doing it and their own behaviour is projected onto their partner.

Me too obviously.

I know that may seem old- fashioned to some ,  but TRUST is all-important in a relationship, and I took it for granted. I trusted him.
I didn't recognise the signs. Even when he left me for another woman, with whom he had apparently been in a relationship with for some yrs, I was utterly stunned. Seems everyone else knew about it but me. DOH How stupid was I?
Sigh.

Emma wrote on Aug 13^th, 2016 at 12:00am:


Or the Mr from Mr and Mrs Smith.. the assassin.

Emma wrote on Aug 13^th, 2016 at 12:02am:
Thats mean. But Im a very attractive man actually. women throw themselves at me. Real women, not drunken skanks. Its a problem for me.

rhino wrote on Aug 13^th, 2016 at 12:08am:


Yeah right.