When she's finished there she should:
Clean the devil out of her left nostril.
check to see if her clitoris has been cut off
Stop herself from laughing too much.
Dip flies in her drink because one of its wings has a disease and the other has the cure for the disease.
After eating do not wipe her hands till she has licked it, or had it licked by somebody else.
Take three breaths while drinking.
Don't forget the ritual after intercourse: The prophet said, “allah puts an angel in charge of the uterus and the angel says, ‘O lord, (it is) semen! O lord, (it is now ) a clot! O lord, (it is now) a piece of flesh.’ And then, if allah wishes to complete its creation, the angel asks, ‘O lord, (will it be) a male or a female? A wretched (an evil doer) or a blessed (doer of good)? How much will his provisions be? What will his age be?’ So all that is written while the creature is still in the mother’s womb.”
Keep her head down when the imam's around: Isn’t he who raises his head before the Imam afraid that allah may transform his head into that of a donkey or his figure (face) into that of a donkey?”
Make sure the sun's not near satans head when she prays: When the (upper) edge of the sun appears (in the morning), don’t perform a prayer till the sun appears in full, and when the lower edge of the sun sets, don’t perform a prayer till it sets completely. And you should not seek to pray at sunrise or sunset for the sun rises between two sides of the head of the devil (or satan).”
Don't worry about dreams of muhammad: “Whoever has seen me in a dream, then no doubt, he has seen me, for satan cannot imitate my shape.
But then again if she did have a bad dream: so if anyone of you has a bad dream of which he gets afraid, he should spit on his left side
Don't yawn satan will get you: “Yawning is from satan and if anyone of you yawns, he should check his yawning as much as possible, for if anyone of you (during the act of yawning) should say: ‘Ha’, satan will laugh at him.”
Keep reciting the qur'an because it's hard to memorize it: So you must keep on reciting the Qur’an because it escapes from the hearts of men faster than camel do.”
Oh and don't forget that stones used to talk to muhammad. allah’s Messenger (may peace be upon him) as saying: I recognise the stone in Mecca which used to pay me salutations before my advent as a Prophet and I recognise that even now.
source of stupidity in the sunnahs of the prophet