Brian Ross wrote on Aug 10
th, 2020 at 10:41pm:
I think you mean Eric Arthur Blair, Soren. There was no one called "George Orwell". Tsk, tsk.
Thank you, Edward Casaubon. Your challenge is to locate any book published under the name Eric Arthur Blair. It would make you very rich if you could find one.
C: No, no, Dickens wrote 'David Copperfield' with *two* Ps. This is 'David Coperfield' with *one* P by Edmund Wells.
P: 'David Coperfield' with one P?
C: Yes, I should have said.
P: Yes, well in that case we don't have it.
C: (peering over counter) Funny, you've got a lot of books here....
P: (slightly perturbed) Yes, we do, but we don't have 'David Coperfield' with one P by Edmund Wells.
C: Pity, it's more thorough than the Dickens.
P: More THOROUGH?!?
C: Yes...I wonder if it might be worth a look through all your 'David Copper- field's...
P: No, sir, all our 'David Copperfield's have two P's.
C: Are you quite sure?
P: Quite.
C: Not worth just looking?
P: Definitely not.
C: Oh...how 'bout 'Grate Expectations'?
P: Yes, well we have that....
C: That's 'G-R-A-T-E Expectations', also by Edmund Wells.
P: (pause) Yes, well in that case we don't have it. We don't have anything by Edmund Wells, actually: he's not very popular.
C: Not 'Knickerless Knickleby'? That's K-N-I-C-K-E-R-L-E-S-S.
P: (taciturn) No.
C: 'Khristmas Karol' with a K?
P: (really quite perturbed) No....
C: Er, how about 'A Sale of Two Titties'?
P: DEFINITELY NOT.
C: (moving towards door) Sorry to trouble you....
P: Not at all....
C: Good morning.
P: Good morning.
C: (turning around) Oh!
P: (deep breath) Yesss?
C: I wonder if you might have a copy of 'Rarnaby Budge'?
P: No, as I say, we're right out of Edmund Wells!
C: No, not Edmund Wells - Charles Dikkens.
P: (pause - eagerly) Charles Dickens??
C: Yes.
P: (excitedly) You mean 'Barnaby Rudge'!
C: No, 'Rarnaby Budge' by Charles Dikkens. That's Dikkens with two Ks, the well-known Dutch author.
etc, etc.