A cabbie picks up a nun. She gets into the cab, and the cab driver won’t stop staring at her. She asks him why he is staring.

He replies: “I have a question to ask you, but I don’t want to offend you”.

She answers, “My son, you cannot offend me. When you’re as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I’m sure that there’s nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive.”

“Well, I’ve always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me.” She responds, “Well, let’s see what we can do about that. But first, you have to be single and you must be Catholic.”

The cab driver is very excited and says, “Yes, I’m single and Catholic!”

“OK” the nun says. “Pull into the next alley, “maybe we will see what we can do.”

The nun fulfills his fantasy with a kiss that would make a hooker blush. But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.

“My dear child,” said the nun, “why are you crying?”

“Forgive me, but I’ve sinned. I lied. I must confess, I’m married and I’m Jewish.”

The nun says, “That’s OK, my name is Kevin and I’m going to a Halloween party.”

Bill was on the side of the road hitch-hiking on a very DARK NIGHT and in the midst of a FIERCE rain storm.

The night was rolling on, and no car went by. The storm was so strong he could hardly see a few metres ahead of him.

Suddenly through the swirling rain Bill saw a car slowly coming towards him. And as it drew level with him, it stopped.

Desperate for shelter and without really thinking about what he was doing, Bill got into the back seat of the car and closed the door. That was when he realized there was nobody behind the wheel and the engine wasn't even on!

Mysteriously and soundlessly, the car started moving slowly forward. Bill looked at the road and saw a curve approaching. Now he was scared, and he began to fear for his life. But just before he reached the curve, a ghostly hand appeared through the window of the car, and turned the steering wheel.

Bill, paralysed with terror, watched how the hand appeared every time they came to a curve.

When he saw the lights of a pub down the road, Bill gathered all his bravery and strength, jumped out of the car, and ran to to the pub.

Wet and out of breath, he rushed inside and asked for two shots of scotch. Shaking and half crying, he began telling everybody about the horrible experience he had just been through. A silence enveloped everybody when they realized he was not drunk, but was for real.

About 10 minutes later, two guys walked into the same pub. They were also wet, and were out of breath. Looking around and seeing Bill sobbing at the bar, one said to the other, "Hey Bruce… that's the idiot who got in the car while we were pushing it."