Is almost here. Yay!

What did you government-sponsored cretins do with your 2024 "Southern Hemisphere" summer? Don't bother for you know no one gives a rat's ass. I bet you kanagroo rooters wasted it on crap beer, burgers, COVID with self-loathing.


I'm planning on doing a lot of drugs. Mainly heavy psychedelics and significant milligram edibles with lawyers from the ACLU to see if I would "freak out" and Boy Howdy will I. Last summer I believed I saw the ghost of Marvin Gaye or at least had a intense conversation with the guy.


gimme that sexual healing

Betcha did not know ACLU lawyers are sluts. All of them. Good news none of them were transplants so no Texans of Californian twitfarts. Plus, I would never waste good drugs with F A T people. But always remember kids, drugs are dangerous and  come with some consequences like I think I permanently buggered up my vision and some ataxia issues. Most likely my corpus callosum is fried. I'm not at all concerned not going to live forever.

Planning on doing more drugs @Marla Mass time before Trump turns America into a permanent fascist police state.

By the way, here's my The Summer of Marla drug-induced song list. No, you will not find it on Suckafy, Pandumpa, or Amazlam Music. Why? Simply because if you subscribe to one of those music-destroying corporate monoliths to "stream" on your over-priced crappy phone which will be burned in a fire pit in India in the next year you're a smacking idiot. Music and drugs should be kicked old school and no, I don't mean vinyl because vinyl is for hipster pussies who think The Righteous Brothers are still relevant. What you do is transfer the vinyl to digital and act too stupid to notice the god damn irony. So blow me with a popsicle stick

So...does it suck? Probably. But I'm way cooler than all of you.


Jon Bedda - Tangiers
Sandie Shaw- Nothing Less Than Brilliant

Yeah, I know. She's a limey but what can you do?

Where was I?

Air Formation - Slow You Down
Not Plain Jane - Symmetry
Dr. Hook - Sharing The Night Together
Santana - Hold On
On Off Man - Baroque
Street Fever - In Your Lungs
Pindrops - Reflection II
Glaare - Mirrors
Dead Serpent - Destruction
Time for Dreams - Death To All Actors
Camper Van Beethoven - Pictures of Matchstick Men
Barry Manilow with Mel Torme - Big City Blues
Frank Sinatra w/Antônio Carlos Jobim- Once I Loved
Logic Stories - Interstellar
The Hollies- He Ain't F A T, He's My Brother
William Orbit - A Touch Of The Night
Mark Allen Smith - Skeleton Fight
Mystic Braves - Shads of Gray
Tami Nelson - Call Your Mama
Billy Fury - Wondrous Place
Marcos Valio - Batucuda Surglu
Jack Rabbit Smith - Speed of Love
Yola - Faraway Look
Jackie Gleason & His Orchestra - Melancholy Serenade
Mitch & Mickey - A Kiss At The End Of The Rainbow
Don Dixon - Praying Mantis
Love & Rockets - Saudade
Hugo Montenegro - Don't You Worry About A Thing
David Bowie - Golden Years
Sheldon Allman - Radioactive Mama
Fastball - Holding The Devil's Hand
Jolie & The Jackalopes - She's Too High (my summer theme song)


Bebo & The Goodtime Boys - Let The Fun Begin
Skeewiff - For A Few Beats More
Joe Henry - Flesh & Blood
Bobby Hebb - Where Are You
Mark & The Mirrors - Hypnotic
Morgan James - Give You Up


Where was I?

Tennis (local band) - Need Your Love
Herb Albert & The Tijuana Brass - Hurts So Good
Radost Moja - Ljubi Menja, Ljubi
The Last Drive - Every Night
Lee Baker - Take It From Me
Lyn Avalon - I Walk The Streets
Whiskey Daredevils - Susan Instead
Carl Lester & The Showstoppers - When You See Me Hurt
Pokey LaFarge - Something In The Water
Melanie - Brand New Key
Bobby Caldwell- Please Be Kind
Chris Joss - The Man With The Suitcase
Vittoria Fleet - Stage Whsiper
Venus In Ares - Heart In A Machine
Tpisy - Lipstick Tree
Mademoiselle Nineteen - Je Ne Vois Que Vous


Marc Almond - Shadows & Reflections
Nelson Riddle - Your Zowie Face
Piney Gir - Puppy Love
The Moons - Today
Jack Jones - Wives & Lovers
The James Hunter Six - This Is Where We Came In
April March - Zero Zero
Dorothy Lamour - The One Rose That's Left In My Heart
Jack Webb - Stranger In Town


The Baseballs - Love On The Brain
The Nude Party - Paper Trail (Money)
The Ugly Beats - Things I Need To Know
The Real Gone Tones - Stick With It
Robert Maxwell - Fly Me To The Moon
The Bird & The Bee - Jamie's Cryin'
Trees Speak - Interference
Coconut Shampoo - Neverever
Quincy Jones- Hang On Sloopy
Trini Lopez - Unchain My Heart
The Heardsman - She Knows It
Memphis Slim - Steppin' Out
The Reasoners - Dull Today
DeVotchka & The Mychael Danna - First Push
Suzi Chunk - I Can't Stand Mirrors
The Galileo 7 - Slipping Away
The Rolling Stones - Ain't No Use In Crying
Cilla Black - I Only Live To Love You
Holly Golightly - Without You Here
Juliet Roberts - High On A Feeling
Orville Peck - Winds Change
The Zanes - The Blob
Nancy Wilson - Call Me
The Blues Brothers - I Don't Know
Henry Mancini - Flamingo
The Brady Bunch - It's Sunshine Day
The Cramps - Goo Goo Muck
Peter Bruntell - Dinosaur
Tami Nelson - Cry Over You
Gary McFarland - Satisfaction
Blue Tofu - Hunger Tango
Clan Of Xymox - Muscovite Mosquito (4AD Mix)



There's more but the point being I'm much cooler than all of you.

Marla wrote on May 28^th, 2024 at 12:01am:



The guy at 2:05 had taken too much LSD:

Here's the Monkey Boy theme song, everyone.



Hang tough, don't puff.

I was so high this weekend I rewatched Stranger Things because I was too lazy to find the remote.



Is this a metaphor or a euphemism?


I liked Season 1 and it should have started and ended there. Lamer Things is recycled 80's pop culture/horror crap shown on corporate tax-free app-related Netsux. For you kangaroo rooters who don't know what Netsux is well, its corporate entity that rips offs syndicated shows by cheating other major television production companies by short changing them on contracts. Now thanks to the F A T Orange man, Netsux also doesn't pay a god damn dime in taxes which means bigger budgets for shows like Stranger Things so they in turn can hire expensive lawyers to avoid copyright suits for when they steal from the likes of Steven King.

Point 2

Lamer Things was the stolen invention of the Duffer Brothers and Sean Levy. Then Duffer Brothers are rumored to be the illegitimate sons of Duff Man from the Simpsons and as for Levy he was the levy that went dry in the Don McClean song.


The Duff Man


Let's recap, shall we?

SEASON 1 A couple of really smacking stupid, suburban white kids mask their homosexuality by playing Dungeons and Dragons in their mother's basement in Nothingbumbuggerville, Indiana where after a binge-eating pizza lose track of time and head for home without getting shot, mugged or raped or come combination of the three. One of the kids sees a monster whose face looks like Courtney Love's vagina, abducts him and keeps him in the "Upside Down" which is really an unoriginal concept taken right out of a Robert Heilman book. Follow so far?

So the kid who is abducted mother goes batshit neurotic between her Valium binders and white trash pre-Walgreeens corporate job where she develops a fetish for a landline telephones bought on credit. Enter a F A T cop who speaks in riddles and apathy and doesn't care for the abducted kid because he was "nailing" a cheerleader in high school. Enter a jock, his jock-ass girlfriend, the jock-ass girlfriend's F A T MAGA friend who is later consumed by Courtney Love's vagina. Enter a clueless but very cool science teacher who seems to be the only one who knows what's going on without knowing what is going on.

Then out of all people Sinead O'Connor  shows up. Sinead O'Connor  turns out to responsible for releasing Courtney Love's vagina on the world. As fate would have it, Sinead O'Connor destroys Courtney Love's vagina after bathing in bath salt and a weird ritualistic southern California enema indoor swimming pool in a high school ritual while the Valium-popping mom and the F A T cop find her annoying son in a forgotten David Lynch movie set.


Her grossness goes all the way up to 11

Though a government welfare program that Reagan was soon to destroy in their somehow oddly rebuilt house the Valium mom, the son who is so autistic he does not realize that the Clash released albums full of songs, and the other annoying son live happily ever after. Or do they?

SEASON 2 Netsux went all out by giving this tripe a bigger budget by upgrading to using a Mac book to do the shittiest special effects on and new characters who add nothing to the advancement of the plot. This was deemed to be acceptable since this show really has no plot.

It all kicks off when these untalented actor dipsnots are playing Atari Pong in what appears to be a clean, almost too clean 80's arcade when wouldn’t you know it, the annoying one develops a flashback from ingesting Purple Microdot and Quaaludes and starts hallucinating and sees a giant tarantula in a thunderstorm. About it, really. It goes downhill from there.


The Republican Party circa 1984

Now, everybody knows that the giant tarantula is really Reagan and the kids and the poo town they live in are liberals. The tarantula tries to sway one of them to become a Republican by making him a spy for the CIA and to instill a pre-Bush war agenda. The annoying kid agrees and also employs a "psyop" climate change deny program by believing that the environment is really cold and that global warming is a myth purporting by the Chinese and Russian think tank groups who want to destroy Yankee imperialism but the giant tarantula is out to stop them.

Soon afterward, Monsanto shows up and starts killing off the vegetation and then comes the gaping plot holes and it's really not worth mentioning further.

**Hums to self, Fernando...**

Marla wrote on May 28^th, 2024 at 12:30am:


Brrrr... beauty is only skin deep.... ugly goes all the way past the bone and back again.....

Marla wrote on May 28^th, 2024 at 1:42am:


She looks to be at least 5 months pregnant. She has a skinny face and skinny legs. If your belly sticks out due to fat, then it would be reasonable that the fat would make its way to the face, arms, and legs. Because it did not, the assumption is that she is pregnant.